Script experimentation with source material – Single group chat turned into a play

(emojis and other reactions have been turned into stage directions)

Scene 19:32, 22/05

Mary ‘Misogynist’ Hall: The back door at matts is open, please use it coz he’s too lazy to get up (Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr and Story time with Connie put their thumbs up)

Scene 21:10, 22/05

Sweet transvestite from transsexual Mexico: What time are youse getting to spoons?

Mary ‘Misogynist’ Hall: Leaving matts now

Sweet transvestite from transsexual Mexico: I will be about half an hour just need to get out of dance clothes (One Husky Boi has love in his eyes)

Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr: I mean we just got on the bus (Sweet transvestite from transsexual Mexico puts a thumb up)

(Sister ‘stickers make me uncomfortable too’ smiles in a car, One Husky Boi looks with love in their eyes)

Sister ‘stickers make me uncomfortable too’: Me also

Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr: That premier bus

Mary ‘Misogynist’ Hall: We’re now in spoons if anyone’s wanting to join us but hasn’t yet (Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr has love in their eyes)

Sweet transvestite from transsexual Mexico: will be along in 15 mins or so (smiles)

Scene 00:32, 23/05

You know nothing John Joe! Im not allowed in hustle

One Husky Boi: Why?

Mary ‘Misogynist’ Hall: Why?

Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr: Why?

AHHH jeez im a butthole: Why?

Mary Pat: WHY?

One Husky Boi: Pourquoi?

Mary ‘Misogynist’ Hall: Eh?

You know nothing John Joe! : They have a problem with how I’m dressed with trackies bottoms (   is surprised)

AHHH jeez im a butthole: Que?

Mary ‘Misogynist’ Hall: What???

One Husky Boi: Oh shit

AHHH jeez im a butthole: Oh for goodness sake

Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr: Wtf

AHHH jeez im a butthole: That’s ridiculous

Mary Pat: That’s bullshit

One Husky Boi: I didn’t realise anyone outside of London actually did that

(Pause) They sure don’t in Wolverhampton (Queen laughs, One Husky Boi pauses to continue)

No one would get in

Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr: Ollies on the case

Queen: It’s hustle, tell them to get over themselves (Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr and One Husky Boi look at them with love in their eyes)

Mary Pat: I’ll fight em

AHHH Jeez im a butthole: We’ll all fight them!

Sweet transvestite from transsexual Mexico: Liverpool do it (She turns her head upside down. One Husky Boi is angry)

Queen: If I need to get out of bed and walk to hustle to argue with some people then I’ll do it (One Husky Boi has love in his eyes)

Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr: Bring it Beth Also get out of bed and come to hustle just cos (Queen and One Husky Boi are surprised)

Mary Pat: I’m here I’ll do it now (Queen looks at Mary Pat with love in her eyes, One Husky Boi is surprised

Queen: I send Gail as my superior and taller self (Mary Pat and One Husky Boi laugh out loud)

You know nothing John Joes! Is there any house within walking distance that has pants that will let me borrow?

Sweet transvestite from transsexual Mexico: Legit my boyfried got turned away for having holes in his shoes @One Husky Boi (they put their thumbs up, One Husky Boi is surprised)

Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr: There’s mine but I doubt you’ll fit tbh

Mary ‘Misogynist’ Hall: I tried to argue but they said if I said if I argued anymore I wasn’t going back in

Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr: W o w I hate bouncers

Queen: Sorry @John Joe, same situation as Megan (looks down sadly)

Mary Pat: Like there isn’t enough people in here to justify turning people away

One Husky Boi: Angery reaccs @Sweet transvestite from transsexual Mexico

Mary Bob: So me and JJ heading back to campus so he can change them coming back x

Queen and Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr look to Mary Bob with love in their eyes, One Husky Boi is surprised)

Ollie can I have my purse back please

One Husky Boi: Yeet

(Queen reacts angrily)

Storytime with Connie: Seb and I are home

(Tolia looks at Storytime with Connie with love in her eyes)

(Mary Pat shows everyone a picture of lots of shots)

Mary Bob: Damnnn

(pause) I leave for 10 minutes (rolls her eyes)

Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr: We’re lost without you

(Mary Bob looks at Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr with love in her eyes)

Mary Bob: but like also save us some

Mary ‘Misogynist’ *aggressively castles* Hall: Why does hustle bathroom smell like coco pops and bad decisions tho

Mary Pat: Does the whole of hustle not smell like that?

Sister Suiuiiigaaaaaaafftttrrrrr : @Emily they’re long gone babes

(Mary Bob sheds a single tear)

You know nothing John Joe! : I’m home but the driver stole my drink

You know nothing John Joe! : My additional chees burger minus burger (cry with laughter)